Rings.

Published June 25, 2015 by Shreya Rajvanshi

A ring and she held her breath,
On the second ring, she released it,
She heard the third ring,
And her hopes started humming,
The fourth one made it’s way
And her hopes started crumbling,
The sixth ring made her hiccups
Choke her throat,
When the seventh one greeted her ears,
Her boat violently shook,
The waves broke the deck,
Drowned her so deep under the
Cold rocks,
That all she heard was the sound of
An empty dialed tone,
As the rings stopped,
And so did her heart.

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11 comments on “Rings.

  • I liked the anticipation and the twist at the end. The only suggestion would be the tense of the verb “choke” into “choked” to match the past tense of the events.
    Nice meeting you Shreyarvj πŸ˜€

      • mmm.. then, the other verb maybe should change. look at the two together:
        1. The sixth ring made (makes) her hiccups /Choke her throat.
        or
        2.The sixth ring made her hiccups, /Choked her throat.

        just suggesting πŸ˜€

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